Why is it that when people ask me "How are you?" and I tell them, they look at me like I'm crazy? I am fine, I am really fine honestly and no I'm not in denial (my therapist says so ok). It's like people expect me to be a sobbing mess and all broken and struggling. Why is it that people kind of tip-toe around the subject of marriage/divorce? Yes I know I am getting divorced, yes I know my marriage broke up. But I also know how unhealthy that marriage was for both of us. I also know how much better I'm functioning in all areas of my life not being in that marriage. And I also believe that two happy people apart are far better than two miserable people together - for everyone. Surely that's a good thing?
Who gets to decide how long I should be in mourning about this? I mourned, I said my goodbye's. It's done, and now I am looking forward and moving on. I don't see the point in hanging on to fear/anger/grief. I don't see the point of hating the ex. I don't want that for myself. I choose to be happy, I choose to move forward and find the good things that has come out of this. I choose NOT to focus on the bad things.
I can't see the point in living in "what-if" and "shoulda, coulda, would've" land. I can't change the past, I can only learn from it and try to not make the same mistakes again and move forward. I can look at myself as an individual and work on changing the things within me that needs changing. And that is exactly what I'm doing.